Rising up.

I saw a show recently on Discovery about Mental Time Travel or in other words, thinking. There were psychologists and scientists both trying to prove that time travel is possible. They said to think back to your early days and you can discover truths about yourself now that you didn't know were there. I sat down and gave this "thinking" a try and came up with a set of memories from my childhood.

My earliest memory is my father accidentally kicking me in the head as he dismounted the bike we were both riding on. I believe I was three. It's all just downhill from that point. I remember the various spots on the carpet in our apartment in Prospect Heights that were stained with my barf. You're welcome. I also remember the car accident my family was in when I was four that had resulted in me going through Aural Glass Extraction. I made that term up for myself because it just sounds too gory to explain to someone I had glass sucked out of my ear. I came up with the memory of the first time I was called a "bitch". It was on the playground at school by a little turd named, Danny. I laughed at him when he fell on his butt after careening off the slide. I was seven.

As I sat back and mentally time traveled I shuddered at all of the embarrassing and just plain boring memories I came up with. My mind is such an a-hole. So, in order for me to put aside all of the uncomfortable thoughts I was having I decided to put in some home movies. I know for a fact that nothing embarrassing will pop up there and make me hide under a blanket. Those tapes have been burned in a ritualistic manner years ago. I saw my family opening presents on Christmas in our old barf stained apartment. It was 1988 and we were so happy and ridiculously dressed. My parents didn't care about the stains on the carpet. No one called me a name. We were happy. I watched everything on that tape and it felt good. I teared up when I saw my Nana but still poked fun at her choice of eyewear. I realized that my memories were much different than what my childhood was really like. Of course you'll think about all the terrible and awkward moments that seem to define you, but they don't. I know I'm not a bitch, and Danny is probably a drug addict now. Everything evens out in the end.