Attention ladies: The skin of your dreams

Are you tired of your skin color? 

Have you grown weary of having to face yet another day as a young, rich, white woman?

Then it's time to discover the latest horrible idea to sweep the nation!
 Chameleonization

Europeans have known this fashion secret for years and have never once tried it. "Scientists" believe it is an "irreversible" and "extraordinarily harmful" procedure and "should never be attempted, ever."

Well, sounds to us like these bozos have never heard of Hollywood! 

As far back as the late 1990's, women have been trying to find the best way to alienate themselves from so -called "normal people". Who needs those old cheekbones anyway when you can get them replaced over and over again. Chameleonization allows you to change your skin color to suit your mood*. It's like living inside a rainbow!

*Please only anticipate one mood as only one color will be used. 

Chameleonization is an often painless procedure that can be done by any trusted physician with all of your credit card information on file. The physician (or whoever) starts by giving you a mild sedative while stroking your hair gently and softly singing 80's pop hits. From there, just sit back, relax, and don't worry about the rest!

Read what these young, hip starlets had to say about the remarkable new fad that is sure to turn heads.

"This is certainly something I have done in my life.." says the girl from that one party scene in Gossip Girl. 

"I've never felt so many emotions after undergoing Chameleonization...Happiness isn't the word I'm looking for.." - Angelina Jolie (lookalike)

"What is this? Get the hell out of my house!" - Lady Gaga

Side effects may include:

Smugness

Spontaneous Jazz Hands

Excessive Swearing

Marxism

Extreme weight loss and gain (often within the same 24 hour period)

Inability to remain seated

and

Bear attacks

So, come on! What are you waiting for? Call now! Doooooo it.

Chameleonization - Because Why the Shit Not?